Making Decisions in a World of Non-Attachment

collaboration image

Communally we’re creating a culture of non-attachment: be in the moment, be present, yolo, no expectations. While this is beautiful and definitely in the right direction, the shadow side of this is to live carelessly, dismissively and selfishly- without any regard for the people and world around us. For example, consumerism, the amount of litter and pollution we create, even ghosting! The is because when we have no future expectations, we don’t know what to base our decisions on. We feel lost. And with people turning away from conservative religious doctrine, we don’t have ethics and morals to frame our choices. These morals are what give us a sense of security and confidence in ourselves and how we conduct our lives.

Therefore, it’s important that each person decides what their own personal ethics are that they choose to live by. What is right and wrong for them, what is for their highest good. When we’re clear on this, decision making becomes straightforward! And to go against our personal ethics will create dramas, make us miserable, throws us off course, out of flow and out of alignment.

To create your own personal ethics, get clear on your principals and values.

I personally follow the principals of the four agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz:

  1. Always do your best
  2. Never take anything personally
  3. Be impeccable with your word
  4. Don’t make assumptions

four agreements chart

My values will always be changing depending on what’s most important to me at a particular juncture in my life. Currently, my values in this order are:

  1. Mastery- coming home to myself, security, enlightenment, fulfillment, being the best version of myself to create a new world,
  2. Health- Balance the body to connect to the soul to harness the mind
  3. Love- pure, unconditional, bliss, animals, speaking and acting from my heart
  4. Accomplishment/ Standards- integrity, principals & values, maturity, fulfilling business and life goals, success, boundaries, class,
  5. Security- Feeling secure and at home with myself in my body, trusting myself, healthy relationship with myself, relaxed
  6. Intimacy- fun & humour, connection, communication, friendship, empathy, compassion, generosity, kindness,
  7. Transformation- learning and growing,
  8. Freedom- non-attachment, letting go, being in flow, not holding back, adventure, exploring the world
  9. Passion/Power- Feeling fully alive, inspiring others, creative self expression, inner power to create
  10. Balance- balanced emotions, peaceful state of mind,
  11. Comfort- luxury

Now, when faced with a decision, whether big or small, I can use my principals and values as guide posts. As Coby K teaches, how we do one thing is how we do everything. If we want to change our life and routines into something more inspiring, we need to realign ourselves and create new habits based on our ethics. Then, we need to uphold our Integrity to these standards. Having this structure allows us to develop a sense of security and true confidence in ourselves and how we conduct our lives. And just imagine the kind of collaborative, blissful world we would create if everyone was doing this!

xoxo
Erika